As it turned out, the bounce was variable throughout the day, so NiB and Ryan’s positive start was very beneficial – both playing some excellent front foot drives and cuts for four. Colin continued Nick’s good work after he was bowled and then Colin and Ryan saw us through to around 70-1 before Ryan was caught at long-on trying to hit the spinner over the top. We had a good platform to build from but progress from thereon was difficult as Jarvis and Molyneux bowled some tight lines, making it tough to get the ball away. Barry was bowled playing across the line to leg, and Ian was given LBW, although it [censored] which at least gave him the opportunity to moan for the rest of the day. Olly and Dave gave Colin some good support from thereon and scored 16 and 20 respectively. However, wickets continued to fall with regularity, including Colin somehow contriving to edge a ball 4 foot up in the air, straight to the keeper, even though he was aiming to hit it to somewhere in Berkshire.

So it was that despite our good start we found ourselves struggling to 133 all out. Duncan and Grant both looked a touch unlucky to have decisions go against them but we didn’t make the best of our good start, and Chippy were definitely favourites as we took to the field after a Nick/Kerry tea of the standard good quality.

Ryan and Duncan, though, were on top form, bowling in the right areas and making life difficult for the Chippy openers. Duncan forced one to chip to Ian at cover point where he took a catch diving forward and the second wicket partnership stuck around for some time without ever getting the scoreboard ticking. The bowling and fielding was tight and there were no easy runs being given away, so it was no surprise when Grant “Handbook” Summersbee snuck one through and took our second wicket. Duncan meanwhile caused himself his traditional bowling injury, being forced to bowl his last over at even slower speed than usual after getting a troubling groin strain.

On the plus side, however, this allowed Barry to attempt to get more wickets than runs, and attempt to re-create his bowling form of the last two years. This he did expertly, with a really tight spell that brought him a deserved 6 wickets, including the key wicket of Tew who had steadied the Chippy ship with a calm and reserved 22. With him gone, however, the wickets began to tumble and we ran through the middle and lower orders. Barry bowled four of them and forced two catches, although he also dropped a caught and bowled chance when he had four wickets, to everyone’s great amusement. With two wickets to get Grant “Navarone” chased an edge to the boundary, and secured a run out with a direct hit. It was an accurate bullet-throw and it summed up how polished our fielding performance was.
Ryan replaced Grant with one wicket still required and despite a wayward beamer at about three million mph, he saw off the final wicket with his 5th ball, to polish off Chipping Norton for 65, and secure a win by 68 runs. After a mixed batting performance it was excellent to see such a tight bowling and fielding show, with barely an error in the field. Stewie kept tidily, Colin apparently did another tree impression, and Barry dropped a catch – all in all it couldn’t have gone much better.
Champagne Moment went to ‘heartthrob’ Grant for his run-out from the boundary. Dave’s six was nominated too.
Pig’s Ear went to Colin for his hilarious dismissal. Barry also got a well-deserved nomination for appealing after bowling someone out, and for his dropped catch. He also had to collect the boundary markers as punishment for his duck.
Man of the match was Ryan for his 30 runs opening the batting and fiery opening spell. Colin was nominated for top-scoring on a difficult pitch and Barry for his 6 wickets.
Net result: Wooton in Round One of the cup after winning the only preliminary fixture. Let’s hope if we get anywhere this year we can remember the selection rules and not get kicked out…

IC

Our first change bowlers were Chief, and NiB. The early pressure of a first Wantage CC bowling performance seemed to get to NiB as he sent down a couple of wides, but he got some deliveries in the right areas later and found a good way to prevent the Hendred number 3 from scoring. Chief in the meantime bowled an excellent spell, pitching the ball in the correct areas and using his variation to snare one wicket (though he deserved better), professionally caught behind by Nicky B, in his first appearance for a long time. With Colin replacing NiB and somehow bowling faster than anyone else in the game, Hendred were begun to put under a bit of scoring pressure, and it was Ian who was able to capitalise. He was generously allowed to get away with 5 full tosses in his first over, including one of the first ball which was slapped straight to Bramley at deep square leg. He eventually decided that using the pitch *might* allow him to actually get some turn on the ball, and picked up 4-21 in his 8 overs.

In the meantime Barry had taken an excellent catch off Colin at mid-off, and Nordic had a rare turn of the arm. He forced one catch that was called a no-ball, but then had another batsmen hole out to the same place. Barry finished off the innings but was hilariously unable to match the bunch of batsmen who managed to get at least one wicket. He at least consoled himself by describing “Tyrannosaur” Colin’s attempt to catch the ball as a tree impression for the rest of the day. Hendred finished on 150-8 off their 40 overs.

After a solid tea, NiB and Nordic opened the batting and watched the ball cautiously. Steve hit a couple of lusty blows in his usual fashion before missing a straight one and getting bowled for 15. NiB took a few overs to work out the pace of the pitch but when he had he began to smite some excellent shots through both the off and leg side, and it was a surprise to everyone when he was trapped LBW for 37. Barry and Ben Rendell then both fell cheaply and Ian and Colin forged a fifth wicket partnership that was not without alarm but included some excellent shots, including a pull for 6 over square leg for Colin and a blistering sweep for 4 from Ian.

Ian’s mistake was to attempt the sweep again next over and he got a top edge and was caught behind for 19. It looked like Colin would see us home professionally with around 20-30 needed but when he was caught at deep mid-wicket for 34 we’d left ourselves under some pressure; first Nicky B was unlucky to be given LBW on one which might have been slipping down leg and then OT and PicNic were up with 20 still needed for victory.

Despite some doubts on the sidelines we needn’t have worried as they went about the job with the minimum of fuss. Until we needed 3 to win, that is, when PicNic flicked the ball of his toes down to square leg to win the game in classy fashion. It was particularly excellent shot placement as there was a whole ring of fielders in Pickers’ usual scoring area, and he saluted the crowd with pleasure as we cheered the penultimate wicket pair back to the pavilion.

Champagne moment went to PicNic for his game-finishing flick. Credit also went to Barry for his catch at mid-off, Nordic for his catch at deep square leg, and PicNic for a diving stop at gully.
Pig’s Ear went to Barry. This could have been for kicking the ball over the boundary, but actually it was for the Hendred number 10 “Dilshan-ing” him over the ‘keepers’ head.
Man of the match went unanimously to Ian for his 4-21. Colin and Nick both got nominations for their runs.

Man of the Match: Colin for finishing up the match with expertise.
Champagne Moment: A six dart combo from “Derek” and Dave to sneak a point when a loss looked most likely.
Pig’s Ear: Barry for trying to hide a dart and stopping us from playing. Also for his hat.

Moods were dampened slightly by the prospect of the pudding pitch on offer, but raised by the news that Swinbrook were only able to muster 7 players for their side, due to split priorities with their second XI who also needed to play to try and avoid relegation. The upshot of it was, we were to field first, and hopefully dash out the Swinbrook order nice and quickly as we only needed to capture 6 wickets. Things started well as Duncan and Grant kept things tight as usual, although no wickets fell until Duncan forced a catch behind for Ben to pouch. Grant was bowling well without forcing a breakthrough, and got an opportunity to hissy fit at James before showing off his newfound guns to a passing car full of ladies. Depending on who you ask, they were very attractive and Grant was “well in”. However he did ruin his good work by throwing his underarmour over the wall and on to the road instead of balancing it casually on the wall.

Meanwhile, Duncan was keeping tight lines, getting another wicket caught behind and almost forcing a tough chance to Ian at short cover. He dived forward on the astroturf pitch, got underneath it, only for it to roll over his forearms towards the floor… After considering claiming it he realised that it wasn’t in the spirit of the game and withdrew the appeal, leaving him with bruised pride, and three nasty astroturf grazes. In the grand scheme of things, however, it mattered not as Barry came on to replace Grant. Although being called for a no ball first up after not telling the umpire his action, his third ball brought a caught and bowled chance which he gleefully took before launching it straight back at the batsman for reasons unknown to him, us, or indeed the batsmen, who understandably took exception and told Barry what he thought of him. Off he went though, and we sought the last few wickets as we tried to wrap up the innings nice and cheaply.

Mabbs came on and bowled tightly, only giving away four runs in his four over spell and bowling three maidens. He captured one wicket, bowling number 6 Bullivant. At the other end, Barry was busy claiming the final two wickets and making sure he was our leading wicket taker for the season. First up Grant took a good catch at the second attempt at cow corner, before inexplicably launching it back at the pitch in celebration. In an echo of Barry’s efforts, he managed to add insult to injury by cracking the batsmen on the back with his celebratory throw. Despite this behaviour making us look like astonishingly large w***ers, the Swinbrook players were gracious enough to accept that we weren’t doing it deliberately. Barry then wrapped up the innings with another catch behind for Ben off one-legged Bellenger.

Chasing 59 with only seven fielders to contend with, Ben and Steve opened the batting, playing expansively and rushing the run rate along. Although Steve fell caught at cover, Ben had taken control and slapped a number of fours in pursuit of our modest total. It had been pointed out that he was the only batsmen in our top 8 who had failed to hit a six all season, so when we were within touching distance of the total, the game became less about winning, and more about whether he could rectify this fact. Smiles were broad as he consistently found the short boundary with one bounce and his frustration began to grow. In the 11th over, he hit three fours on the bounce, coming ever closer to the elusive maximum, before only managing a single off the 5th delivery. This left us with 4 required for the win, and it was with evil pleasure that from the side-lines we all called for NiB to finish it up with a six. As the ball fell short outside off stump with a very short cover boundary, schadenfreude was attained as it crept over the rope without bouncing and we won by 9 wickets. Nick got off the mark for the first time ever with a six, and Ben was left with 43 not out and no sixer.

So, our two hour match had finished and we took maximum points. This didn’t matter however, as Cairns Fudge also took maximum points in a similar match away to Great Horwood. So our customary second place finish was confirmed. On the plus side an early finish meant opportunities to attain pleasure in other ways. First up was as much tea as you could possibly manage, without worries of being too full for optimum cricketing performance. So the hot dogs, fried onions, pizza, high class sandwiches and homemade cakes were devoured by all and sundry. Second up was a “closest to pin” golfing competition, where Dave was able to confirm his status as leading Wantage CC golfer and earn himself a tenner into the bargain, by beating out Mabbs, Steve and the entire Swinbrook side.

Third up was two rounds of paper scissors and stone to decide some of our tightly fought awards. It was unanimously decided that Nick’s six to win the match and deny Ben his boundary was Champagne Moment, but the others were much more closely fought. First Barry and Grant tied for Pig’s Ear after their cack handed celebrations. In a rare display Grant showed the wherewithal and nous to oust Barry 2-0 with a scissors/scissors combo, meaning for the first time in a while he could celebrate not winning pig’s ear. And celebrate he did, running round the pitch with his shirt over his head. Man of the match was perhaps even more exciting as we were torn between Ben for his 43* and Swinbrook CC for kindly only playing with seven and giving us a 5 star tea. Unlike his pursuit of his six though, Ben was able to secure success on this occasion, leading to a pumped cheer and celebration after beating a Swinbrook representative in the important decider.

With that, we were back to the club by 5pm, which left a lot of time for drinking and socialising. Jugs were poured, lager was consumed and Columbus Darts was taught. This led to the subsequent match report which is going to make everyone roll their eyes apart from Ian, Colin and Grant. With a boozy spring in our step, we also partook of a curry at the House of Spice as we reflected on a good finish to a fine season. Cricketing talent has been fulfilled, friends have been made with other clubs (unexpected!) and we attended our first Wantage CC wedding. Here’s to next year!

IC

Grant got a deserved wicket when the becalmed Hart edged behind, and the Horley middle order proved to be effective without it ever looking as though we were out of the game. There was one comedy moment as they tried to run an overthrow despite the ball being collected by short midwicket, and one of the season’s easier run outs was completed. On another day we, and Barry in particular, might have got wickets much earlier through catches going to hand or inside edges going onto stumps, but it wasn’t to be.
Colin took advantage of our strength in depth by trying a number of bowling options, with Mabbs picking up one wicket and a rare Saturday turn of the arm for Ian. As the innings drew to a close the batsmen hit out and it took the return of Ryan to snare some more wickets, including a superb caught and bowled, and he finished with 5-53, a fine effort after the tap received in the first over. Our target for victory would be a substantial 218, although with the pitch offering good carry and the fast outfield, it wasn’t out of the question.

Teas were absolutely splendid with an extensive selection including, pizza, fruit kebabs, flapjacks and scones with jam, cream and strawberries – definitely worthy of the prestigious award of four teapots.

The batting order boasted a new opening partnership as Ben was partnered with Nordic instead of chief blocker NiB in an effort to get the innings off to a fast start. NiB didn’t have much time to enjoy life in the middle order as Ben spooned the second ball of the innings to point, and he started scratchily as his first 6 runs came off edges through the third slip area. Nordic batted in trademark fashion, with straight balls defended and any width on the off side brutally exploited. He eventually chipped a catch to cover which was taken at the ninth attempt and departed for 17.

Barry hit a glorious off drive to the boundary off his first ball and was going well on 15 until he clipped a low chance to midwicket which was well taken by Hart off the bowling of Beck, who offered some justified retaliatory chirping as Barry departed. The skipper then came to the crease and played watchfully against the accurate bowling of Beck and Pearce. That all changed after drinks when he bashed 18 off an over from Pearce, and the momentum that was lacking before drinks had returned. Hart then brought himself on to bowl and proved a canny customer who was difficult to get away.

After being instructed to bat through and informed that it was Beck’s last over, NiB took the moronic decision to come down the pitch and was beaten by the flight and turn, and was stumped for 55. Not great, and things took a turn for the worse a couple of overs later as Colin was completely deceived by Hart and was stumped by a country mile for 34, with the target still around 80 runs away. After Ian came and went for a brisk 11, this left Ryan and our man for a crisis, Dave Summerset, with quite a job on their hands.

They started in sensible fashion by taking a look at the bowling and running aggressively, albeit with one mid-pitch committee meeting which almost proved terminal. Ryan then started to open up as the quicker bowlers returned from the pavilion end, and he unfurled some classy drives. Summerset then got in the act with a couple of boundaries of his own, including the Saturday debut of his flick through square leg for four. They got us to within touching distance of the target until Dave flicked a delivery over midwicket which was caught low down on the boundary in excellent fashion, and we wondered if we would fall at the last hurdle. Ryan had other ideas though, as he lofted a big six into the nearby field to ease concerns about run rate. Two were needed from the last over, and after blocking the first two deliveries Mabbs cut a four to take us to victory by three wickets, with Ryan finishing on a run-a-ball 55 not out.

Overall a fine effort to chase down a big target, but we were forced to work hard by a Horley side who played hard but fair, including all batsmen walking, and were very generous in their post-match comments. We wish them all the best for next season.

Man of the match – unanimously Ryan for five wickets and a fantastic 55* to win the game
Champagne moment – Ryan again, for his six or his catch
Pig’s ear – was almost Ian for a stroppy walk to the park bench to sulk after his dismissal, but this was outvoted by the spot that Grant was sporting on his nose, which could have illuminated an aircraft hangar, or been seen from space

Despite an early rain break, both bowlers were keeping things tight, neither giving opener Campbell any room to play his favoured back foot shots, and Ryan eventually saw for him with an excellent pitched up ball which smacked middle stump and sent one bail halfway to the boundary. Chesterton’s demon run scorer Lewis was next in and he and White looked like classy batsmen from the off who we would have to prise away rather than being given their wickets. Fortunately Duncan was on fine form, which meant we were able to celebrate White’s wicket when he edged behind to Ben behind the stumps (another “professional” Wantage wicket – we’re getting good at those!).

Things were tight as the drinks break was reached without more wickets. However, the old adage “drinks brings a wicket” was proved correct as Grant forced the batsmen to slice to Barry at gully. When he trapped another batsmen LBW we were looking good, although Lewis was still there and batting well. Our opportunity to get him came once Barry had replaced Duncan and Colin fielded the ball and threw it in with Lewis stranded half way down the wicket. Barry had ages but instead threw the ball at the stumps, missed, and gave him a rather large life.

On the plus side, Grant forced our nemesis from last time Trevor Price to attempt his customary bash over long off. This time however, Colin was there, and despite being the smallest person on the field he just managed to cling on to a high chance which left us truly in the driving seat. It also saved any boundary markers from being destroyed! In the meantime Barry was receiving some real tap at the other end, his policy of bowling half trackers to a not particularly packed leg side field proving a questionable one. However Mabbs was to come on to replace him and force the issue with some tight bowling that deserved more than it got. He did force one wicket, and Grant dropped a chance over his shoulder at square leg in a very casual manner. Barry finished off the innings with two wickets in the final over, although not before Lewis had brought up his hundred with a smash over mid-wicket for six. Chesterton finished their innings on 179 for 8.

Teas were marvellous, because Ian made them. There were customary amounts of squirty cream and jam, and a delicious fruit selection.

Ben and NiB opened our innings as per usual, and both looked confident and assured. Their run rate was much higher than usual as we went at four an over. Ben in particular looked in excellent form as he drove and pulled his way to an excellent 30 before we had another short rain break. Things were looking good though as the two of them put on 92 before Nick was LBW. He had almost walked before the umpire gave him out so it was not a great surprise when the finger finally went up.

Colin was next in and continued his recent form, holding up an end perfectly well whilst Ben saw himself over 50 and we looked for an easy finish. This was not to be the case as Ben pulled the spinner to cow corner and was caught for an excellent 72 – his best knock of the season. Barry scored a quick-fire 14 before also bashing to cow. Colin then followed suit after scoring a good 30 before Ian decided that learning from other’s mistakes is for losers, and also pulled the spinner to cow and being caught for one. It must have been the damp pitch that was causing everyone to pull the spinner there. That’s all this reviewer wants to say. The Chesterton fielders certainly couldn’t understand why all our batsmen were playing those shots either.

Luckily, Dave “Game finisher” Summersbeater was next in, and with Ryan scored the remaining 15 runs to see us over the line and to promotion. Celebrations at this stage were pretty muted with lots of gruff congratulations and “well dones”. Showers were by all accounts slightly less muted, with ? of a bottle of vanilla shower gel being guzzled instantly and scorer Mongo joining in, just for fun. Other post-match entertainment included The Challenge™ which amounted to sprinting to the other side of the field and back. Grant was apparently leading the way, and others were forced to change back into spikes and take the challenge themselves. NiB acquitted himself extremely well, taking second place, whilst Barry fell over with about 20 metres left to go to everyone’s amusement. It would also prove ill-advised for the President’s XI game the following day as muscles would undoubtedly be tired for this most important of Sunday matches.

We then partook of a few beverages at the club before anti-lads Stewie and Duncan were forced home to their partners because they were in the doghouse for playing twice in a weekend. The rest of us hit the Blue Boar and the Swan for early drinking games and then an unusually early finish, with everyone home before midnight! A sad indictment upon all of us considering no-one was over the age of 28. Not that it stopped hangover central on Sunday morning. On the plus side we did get to drink luminous drinks in the Swan which is a promotion requirement.

Champagne Moment was Colin’s catch. Dave’s runs to win the match were also nominated, as was a stop by Stewie at point which would have graced many a cricket ground.

MotM was Ben Putt for his 72.

Pig’s Ear was Grant. I can’t even remember what for. I think it was a combination of the dropped catch and previously mentioned four year old’s run out attempt. Barry was nominated for his run-out misdemeanours too.

Net Result: Promotion! Yeah, cricket!

IC

Grant ‘6 pack’ Summersbee and Ren r rrr Ren were given the arduous task of opening the bowling on the exceedingly flat wicket, proving that quick bowling wasn’t going to be the flavour of Wantages day. With Walker and Harris getting there eye in quickly, it seemed to prove that bowling was somewhat of a difficult task and after 4 overs the angry one decided to take himself off. Mongo without prompt then thrust himself into the attack with some on occasion interesting off spin bowling, which seemed to restrict the rate.

After a tidy spell of 6-0-26-0 Ren was then replaced the most famous member (thanks to a barmy modelling contract) Olly ‘Chief’ Haine. Where more conventional off spin continued to stabilize what could potentially be a fast scoring rate. After a period of tying Harris in knots Haine unleashed an insightful, some may say wide ball, which with some rapid glove work from Jimmy ‘the cat’ Wallbridge brought a stumping. The first of two!

Mongo managed to bully out a 6ft 4 16 year old only to be taken off the following over for the more seasoned Olly ‘The power’ Taylor. The chunky one finished with interesting figures of 7-0-35-1. Chief was then taken off and replaced with the curry monster Moobs after taking figures of 7-0-35-2. Having taken a pair of quick wickets each, with the aid of some inspirational bowling OT and Moobs had the arduous task of bowling at Hume and Russell who quickly got their eye’s in and dominated on such a flat track. 6 pack finished off his spell and the remainder of the 40 overs. Grant finishing on figures of 7-0-53-0, OT on 6-0-62-2 and Moobs who smashed 2 quality wickets in his first over ended up with 7-0-77-2.

Tea was an affair not up to Challow’s usual high standards and will make one in particular reporter think twice about making the heady journey to the wilds of Windmill Hill again. Where was the cheese and biscuits from last year? Coronation chicken sandwiches were good as were the chicken goujons and roast potatoes were a nice touch. I don’t think I’m harsh in only offering 3.5 tea pots! Perhaps they could get the ice cream van to park-up next year?

In true Wantage fashion the repose to Challows challenging score of 283 for 8, was emphatic. With a little bit of possibly tourrets style calling Dave Somerset managed to run out the Saturday captain Ming for a poultry 7 runs. Nordic after having possibly cheese based lucid dreams of scoring a ton failed to bother the scorers and was bowled by what I can only presume was an absolute jaffer (I was frantically throwing my pads on as a collapse ensued).

The man from the West country was then bowled by a by now fiery Alderson going back to a good length ball leaving the away team on a score of 13-4! There was no answer for the sporting backlash (are we going to dope test the Challow player), Mongo and OT were required to steady the ship. OT with his sound, cultured defence and Mongo with his at times exuberant flourishing and expected cover drives and the capacity to play inside the line of the ball, steadied the ship and even pushed the waning score along. Till disaster struck. The well groomed OT went back to a full ball a la Somerset and was alas bowled for 14.

Next man in was Moobs who started off cagy (due to his father being in the crowd!) but started to find some form with the bat to illustrate to watchful eyes that he really does know how to use that expensive piece of willow which I’m going to name Kerry. The boobed duo held there own for a considerable period of time and brought the game to a more manageable state, however the taller chunky lad was undone, bowled by possibly the slowest ball of the day, which trickled under his bat. Mongo who looked like he should have been on for a ton scored a streaky 75 off 52 balls.

This unfortunate event brought on the batting prowess of Jimmy Wallbridge (nickname unsuitable for print). After some cultured flailing, was trapped plumb LBW for 2. The fall of wicket brought the very angry Grant Summersbee to the crease who was in no mood to hang around scoring 19 very useful runs, but was bowled by Gordon playing an outlandish ‘shot’.

Chief then had a little go at batting but just wasn’t given enough time to manufacture the win and in the spirit of the game donated his wicket so that Ren could have a go for the last 3 balls. Of which these were some of the most bizarre events in the history of cricket. Two solidly blocked dot balls were then followed by an exquisite cover drive where not only did two of the more festively plump members of the team manage to run 4 on a short boundary, but 4 overthrows were awarded due to some sloppy fielding, leaving Ren on 8!

Due to the nature of the match the usual hijinx of shower time did not occur, much to the discus of the shower captain. As always the day was finished off with the awards. Pigs ear was given to Dave Somerset who showed good ‘techers’ and was nutmeged for 4 on possibly one of the smoothest outfields known to man. Ren was awarded Champagne moment for scoring 8 off one ball. Last and least Mongo was awarded Man of the match for I can only guess an entertaining innings. Smashy!

C. Mercer 7 (7)
D. Summersbee 2 (4)
S. Bramley 0 (2)
S. Martin 0 (6)
M. Tugwell 75 (52)
O. Taylor 14 (27)
J. Mabbet 55* (79)
J. Wallbridge 2 (6)
G. Summersbee 19 (31)
O. Haine 4 (15)
R. Pretourious 8* (3)

Much love Mongo x

They were unable to take advantage though and progress was very slow as we went at less than one an over for the first 6. The rest of the Uffington team slowly joined the fray but the only thing of note to happen was NiB failing to pull a ball off Green which meant he hit it to the “man in the pink hat” who took a nonchalant one handed chance above his head. It was as unexpected for their team as ours as they whooped and cheered, and Colin went in at number three. Progress remained slow as the pitch and very wet conditions made for very difficult conditions in which to score, as Key got a lot of movement down leg off the pitch and Green was both swinging and seaming the ball away from the batsmen.

The Wantage fans and watching players were getting slowly frustrated on the sidelines as the score remained at no more than 2 an over. Colin and Ben did both hit one or two excellent shots through the off side but it was not an easy pitch to score on and they were at least doing the worthwhile job of protecting our egg shell middle order from the leading bowlers. Colin then won pig’s ear by being out yet not out yet not out yet out, or something. It was difficult to tell on the sidelines but it seemed that he was given out caught behind, looked a bit miffed whereupon the bowler withdrew his appeal because he agreed that the ball had not come off the bat. Spirit of the game indeed!

Ben eventually fell to first change bowler Johnson with the score on 80-ish off 30 overs and Barry joined proceedings with the express intention of upping the run rate. He and Colin did this before Colin was bowled for 33, and it fell to our middle order to hit some hefty blows and lift our score to something respectable. Ryan played some strong drives before being caught at square leg, then Ian joined Barry in the middle. Barry ran himself out whilst attempting to put the fielder under pressure which looked a bit village to say the least, although he scored a decent 30. Olly then lasted only a few balls before being bowled. It meant Dave Summerset, having not scored on Friday, had to start scoring, and quickly. He and Ian put a rapid 30 runs onto the total, despite Ian attempting to run himself out 3 times. He departed for 24 after hitting to long-off and it was left to Mabbs and Dave to run hard for the last 4. This they did, lifting us to 175 and our fourth batting point which included a HUGE six from Dave in the last over, dispatched over wide long on – what a man!

The Uffington innings started slowly as Ryan and Duncan turned the screw, and it became apparent that 175 was actually an excellent total on a tough pitch. Breakthroughs were slow, but the run rate was almost as slow as our own. The first wicket eventually came in Grant’s first over, who had replaced Ryan and found some prodigious swing, which at times proved difficult to control. That said, the brilliant catch low down at gully by Barry looked like as professional a wicket as Wantage have ever taken. Barry certainly enjoyed it. Professional-looking wickets continued as Duncan’s tight bowling brought him some rewards, an excellent first slip catch by James Mabbs and a thin edge through to keeper Ben. Duncan had apparently taken exception to Ian’s claim that he had lost a bit of pace recently, and the effect was having him really push the ball through and getting some rip-roaring wheels going on.

Our first change bowlers proved too much for the Uffington middle order and in turns they began to lob some catches to our ring fielders. Mabbs came on and bowled a tight, fiery spell after Duncan’s twelve overs for 18. This was as well as he had bowled all year and he got a well deserved 4 for 10 including two in two balls. NiB, Ryan and Dave all took simple catches as we ran through the Uffington order for 78. The final wicket fell off Barry “simon” Martin as he shouted “DON’T DROP IT” at Colin in an amusing attempt to put him off and we walked off happily with an excellent team performance, a 97 run win and 29 points.

There was also more good news as some of us went out for a delicious curry and we discovered that Chesterton had lost to Great Horwood by three runs. This puts us 52 points ahead with 3 to play, and with Chesterton at home next week, and you know what that means…

Pig’s Ear went to Colin for his hokey cokey moment – in/out/in/out. Nomination also to some horrendous chat throughout the day, from Barry for his “Don’t drop it!” and Duncan for congratulating Mabbs on a great spell as he was about to bowl. Credit also to the umpire for yapping as we were about to bowl a ball!

Champagne Moment was Dave’s HUGE six in the last over of our innings. Barry’s gully catch was also worthy of a mention and Ian’s six over the bowlers head got a sympathy nom.

MotM: Went to Mabbs for his 4-10. Dave was a close contender for his 28* at the death and Duncan for his fine bowling.

~Icey

Ryan opened the bowling, and played the Duncan Wooloff role almost to perfection, as he kept a tight line and didn’t give anything away throughout his twelve over spell. The only thing which let you forget it wasn’t Duncan was the lack of complaining about “not getting the wickets he deserved”! He did, in fact, take 2, bowling someone with a yorker early on and forcing a catch to NiB at cover. At the other end, Grant bowled tightly for most of 8 overs, only one over getting a bit of tap as he let fly with 5 wides and got hit for a couple of fours.

Brill’s opener Fitsell was scoring slowly but clinging tightly to his wicket, so the scoring rate remained between two and three an over even as Mabbs came on to replace Grant. Ryan finished his spell after only going for 20 and immediately Chaz got a wicket as he came on to replace him, Ryan taking the catch at mid-wicket. Chaz began to dominate proceedings as his recent wicket-capturing form continued and he tore through the Brill middle order, getting the left handed Mansfield caught and bowled and Judd well caught by Mabbs at point. Only a fine catch at mid-wicket by Barry off a very ill looking Mabbs interrupted “Charlie’s” dominance. Mabbs was performing wonders, considering every other ball he was hacking up yards of luminous green phlegm. He was strictly banned from shining the ball with his mucus and high fives were off the menu lest we caught his plague, so elbows were the weapon of choice for congratulations.

Barry eventually replaced him, and although he failed to get a decision on a caught behind, he struck soon after, getting Green LBW, and then a caught and bowled next over. In the meantime, despite getting struck for two mighty sixes by Kavanagh, Chaz saw off the innings, taking an excellent 5-28 and deserving the majority of our bowling plaudits. Ryan, displaying a cricketing knowledge beyond his age, declared that the total of 117 was actually pretty competitive as the pitch was, as one of the Brill batsmen declared, a “pudding”, with variable bounce and the potential to break things. NiB was to discover this to his cost in our innings.

Ben and NiB opened as usual, and looked pretty settled until Ben was unlucky to poke behind off his legs, before Colin was caught behind. He felt he had edged into the ground but the umpire, 11 Brill players, NiB at the other end and most of the Wantage team felt he probably hadn’t. So having scored 99* in the return game he was unfortunately unable to make a century for the season against Brill!

Barry was next in and looked confident and assured as usual, but took on one too many shots and was well caught at cover and suddenly Brill’s total looked a long way away, especially once Ryan had edged to slip. Ian played some airy shots in a style as far removed from NiB as possible, and it was not a great surprise when he was bowled by a good yorker from Kavanagh, who was bowling a tight spell and according to Brill’s own report deserved some luck for a change. Dave Somerset was next in and kept a cool head as he usually does in these situations, adding 12 good runs in a fine partnership with NiB which steadied the ship somewhat although when he was also out bowled to a full toss things were looking very dodgy with 40 runs still required.

Stewie and Chaz both fell for ducks although both at least survived a few overs each, giving NiB the chance to extend his run scoring. The adrenaline was pumping hard now, as he later revealed he no longer felt the pain in his thumb suffered from an injury in the field and his new bat had its virginity taken after he cracked his faithful old Newbury. Grant entered the fray with about 30 needed for victory and looked calm and assured, which was more than could be said for his watching team-mates. Nick began to hit the bad ball hard and true as he dominated proceedings, playing some excellent flicks off his pads over square leg, and a couple of excellent off side dabs. All this despite wearing a ball on the helmet, after a good length ball leapt up and took him in the head. It was to the dump with the helmet, and Colin’s green lid at least got the chance to spend some quality time in the middle as NiB wore it to finish his innings. Grant was oozing confidence by now and between him and Nick they took us to within 15 before both were dropped in the space of 6 balls. Grant tested the fielder at cow corner before NiB was dropped by Brill’s sub fielder (on after an emergency call out for Brill’s keeper) at mid-off in what would prove to be crucial fashion.

As it happened, Nick was still there to slam a full toss over backward square for six off the 4th ball of the 43rd over to take us to victory. The Wantage players were ecstatic, even Dave despite the ball cannoning into his car. NiB looked delighted in the middle as he threw his arms up in the air in an unusually dramatic display of emotion and we were relieved and happy to come away from the wind turbine-assisted match with 28 points.

We didn’t hang around for pleasantries although Brill were an excellent bunch who played cricket in the right spirit (batsmen who walked! A rarity for the season) and certainly on this evidence don’t deserve to be in the relegation zone. Instead we were off to shower and suit-up in preparation for the important event of a Wantage CC wedding! Even Toby the plastic Australian turned up and a good time was had by all. Barry performed a memorable dance to Beyoncé’s “Single Ladies”, the Eton Mess on offer was astonishingly good, and Timmy Lane and Chaz brought out their braces. Ping, Pang, Pong was also enjoyed by an extensive section of the Wantage playing staff and supporters, although Barry was less impressed, declaring “Why are you all playing Chinese games when in ten years we’ll all be able to play Chinese games?!”. I’m sure there was some logic in there somewhere. He soon left to eat buffet straight from the table with his fingers.

The festivities were finished with some sprinkler dancing as Nick and Kerry began their life as a married couple – let’s just hope they don’t give up on doing teas!

Motm: NiB, obviously, for a brilliant 58* which won us the match. Chaz’s 5-for was also worth mentioning.
Pig’s Ear: Colin for his complaints about his dismissal.
Champagne Moment: Undoubtedly the winning runs, which could have had Dave’s windscreen out if it had only gone another metre!

~Icey

Pod and Mr Lonnan came on to open the batting and both got off to a solid start. Crowther and Fanstone opened the bowling. For the first 7 overs the run rate was a steady 4.5 an over, and both gentlemen were playing well. After Richie smashing a wonderful cover drive for four, the next ball he forgot where his off stump was a left one and was bowled. This brought Moobs to the crease and batted very sensibly, pushing the ball about with Pod. This did bring the rate down, when Pod got bowled by Strange trying to hit a ball that should have gone to the boundary. 68 for 3 came about when Jimmy hit a full toss to point where Picnic was, he took a good catch. Moobs got bowled a run later by Strange after playing some nice shots.

A sickle of wickets came as Nordic was caught for a duck and won the opportunity for picking up the boundary markers after the game. Coach whose only objective to not to have a diamond pair for the weekend and smashed a six for his first scoring shot. Then tried to repeat the same scoring shot but was caught on the boundary. Oatibix was also bowled by Strange to give him his 5for.

This left Wantage at a dangerous score of a 100 for 7, which left the tail needed to wag. In truly Mongo fashion he played some aggressive shots, hitting the ball hard to the boundary. The last three wickets got Wantage up to a score of a 153 all out. Mongo top scored with 27 (three 4s and a 6). Somerset was bowled. Leaving Ren being the final wicket who was stumped whilst practising a shot out of his crease, which left Stewie looking less than impressed at the other end.

C.Mercer Bowled Strange 11
R.Lonnon Bowled Crowther 14
J.Mabbett Bowled Strange 26
J.Wallbridge Caught (Picnic) Strange 8
S.Bramley Caught White 0
B.Martin Caught Strange 6
O.Taylor Bowled Strange 7
M.Tugwell Caught Fanstone 27
D.Summersbee Bowled Crowther 12
S.Bulpitt Not out 16
R.Pretorius Stumped (while practicing a shot) McGuiness 5

Extras 19
Total 151

Crowther 8 0 28 2
Fanstone 8 1 31 1
Strange 8 3 19 5
Eltham 5 0 28 0
White 5 0 34 1
McGuiness 0.1 0 0 1

After a lovely tea by Libby with some amazing cakes thanks, Wantage got the field to defend an under par score of 151. This is leaving Crowmarsh only needing a run rate of 3.78. Stewie opened the bowling, the fifth ball of the over was probably one of the strangest and bazaar events thats ever happened. Stewie bowled a horrible low full toss, Eltham straight drove the ball which would have gone to the boundary. However, the ball was moving at some pace and hit his opening partner’s bat, which gave Stewie an easy catch. There was some debate over if this was out of not, this brought Grant “google” Summersbee in which checked the rule book and confirmed that this was out. This let the continuous banter towards Google Grant that everything should be checked using this particular technology.

Tight bowling reduced Crowmarsh to a run an over, this did lead to Ren breaking inroads by bowling Strange and Keeble. This led to Crowmarsh being something for 3, (would know if they continued to fill our scorebook out!). Stewie and Ren bowled out which led to Coach and Oatibix continuing to lift the run rate. Simon Martin came in for Crowmarsh at five and played an awesome shot for four off Coach’s bowling before being the first of three crazy run outs.

Oatabix bowled exceptionally well and took the wickets of Crowmarsh’s batsman 6 and 7. First was caught, as Roy hit straight up in the air and Jimmy (with the keepers gloves on) kindly shouted “mongos!!!” who was standing six foot away from him. The second wicket of Oatabix was bowling Crowther. However, he wasn’t too happy due to Jimmy and Ren talking behind the stumps expressing to each other what a beautiful day it was. Let’s be honest the batsman should have walked away. Another note was the verbal school girl antics and Jimmy and Moobs behind the stumps for this during of the first change bowlers, thankfully Nordic separated them.

Crowmarsh vs Wantage would never be the same without a little fiction between one another. This came from Coach being unimpressed by the umpire signalling a six or a four, even though Pod indicated it was a four. This did become a more little affair and a bit of friendly banter from the rest of the duration of the game.

With tight bowling and fielding, Crowmarch’s run rate had become a run a ball. Somerset and Mongo came on to bowl. Somerset bowled well and was let down by drops by Ren and Stewie (sorry Dave) from giving him a well-deserved wicket. Mongo munched up two wickets, both bowled, one being Picnic. Leaving a wicket to get, there number 11 and McGuiness still there from opening the batting. McGuiness playing well however, conservatively through his innings didn’t have much faith in his partner only wanted to keep the strike and they went for a second run which was there and Moobs threw the ball in for Jimmy to take the bails.

Eltham Caught and Bowled Bulpitt 0
McGuiness Not out 68
Strange Bowled Pretorius 2
D.Keeble Bowled Pretorius 9
S.Martin Run out (C.Mercer) 4
Ray Caught (Tugwell) Taylor 14
Crowther Bowled Taylor 6
Wayne Run out (B.Martin) 1
Fanstone Bowled Tugwell 1
Picnic Bowled Tugwell 0
Keeble Run out (J.Mabbett) 0

Extras 5
Total 110

S.Bulpitt 8 4 9 1
R.Pretorius 8 1 23 2
B.Martin 6 0 39 0
O.Taylor 7 3 10 2
D.Summersbee 3 0 12 0
M.Tugwell 2 0 13 2

Man of the Match: C.Strange got the overall MOTM for taking 5 wickets. Stewie was voted Wantage MOTM, however not considered for the overall MOTM. Mongo was for topscoring, taking two wickets and a catch. So really should be Mongo who did.

Champaign moment: Was Stewie stop on the boundary. I am still telling random people in the street how good it was!! Really it was ask me about it!

Pig ear: After the normal antics in the showers, Jimmy thought he was about to use deodorant which turned out to be shaving foam! He even told everyone he bought it earlier thinking it was deodorant! This led to Mongo nearly falling off the bench in laughter.

Overall result was Wantage beat Crowmarsh by 41 runs. This is the first time in the cups history that Wantage has retained the Derek Shorter Memorial Cup.

~Stewie